Unspoken to Self.

I am standing at the door. Knocking.  Waiting for you to let me in.  You are trying  to write me away. Constructing the perfect haikus and tankas to split me into order. How do you look me in the eye and still manage to erase me at the same time.  I want to meet you.  I want to love you. But you keep shutting the door in my face.  You recite to yourself that you are not deserving of such visitation. Say I am a distraction. How do you destroy yourself so meticulously? You rob yourself of the freedom to love someone else either than the institution of yourself. Point me to the place where they broke you. Where in your body does it hurt the most. I want to come in and say hello. My soul,  meet yours and love the pain out of you. Open the door.